MALE MOLESTATION: AUNTY STOP TOUCHING.

A colleague of mine had accused me of molesting him, twice.

Me!!! what I do ?

On both occasions, I could hardly make out what I did "wrong". We were not alone in both occasions and I never "touched" him, I swear. What and how he perceived as molestation is (only) known to him and unknown to me.

Of course, I always laughed off the accusations. How can I be molesting you, are you not even happy that I am joking with you? ( this is me trying to avoid using the word "playing" with him- remember I did not touch him, I swear)

I think he even blurted out one time that he would report me. I laughed that off even harder. Report me kwa, to who? What would you even say I did( remember I did not touch him, I still swear). Any (constituted) authority that has powers over us would definitely be occupied with "better" complaints to resolve than an accusation of a girl molesting a boy( does that even happen?).

After his second out-cry, he did not accuse me again. I don't know, maybe I had stopped "molesting" him. For God's sake, up till now, I don't even know what actions of mine amounted to molestation in his judgement. Maybe he spoke up "twice too many" and I "backed-off". I don't know for sure though.

That is how it is,actions that amount to molestation, harassment is not up to the " offender" to define, it's up to the "offended" or should I say the " offendee". To the offender,he or she may only be cracking "harmless" jokes or a silly play,but the acts are a discomfort or jest to the other person and in their judgement is weighed as molestation.

Male molestation is considered a mirage, a joke at best. But everyday and almost everywhere, a man lives through actions that amounts to molestation or harassment in his own judgment. We don't hear much of it,just like female molestation is under reported. Men are even faced with more possibility of being laughed-off. Shouldn't they be "grateful" that a female made an "offer" ,after all men make offers all the time, abi?

Like I already said, there is hardly any constituted authority that is charged with complaints such as a "girl molesting a boy". I suppose they would have better matters to adjudicate. If it's the other way round, association of female lawyers will raise and champion the course. One may be tempted to ask if there are no male versions of such associations?

Regardless, the pain, discomfort, feeling of violation is just as real( for male and female alike). And victims try to do everything within their powers to end the actions, but they are what they are - victims. If they were so strong,they would not have become easy prey.

Of course not all molestations are as  subtle as the one my colleague accused me of( I still don't even know what I did wrong, I still maintain,  I never touched him). Some actions are full-blown outright assualts that peak the scale of Joseph and "Portiphars's wife.

It may be easy to overpower the muscles, but a voice can be unflinching.

Speak up!!!

Men keep saying that women are the weaker sex,so they find it impossible to admit that they are being preyed by the " weak". Speak up today. My colleague spoke up and ended my nuisance ( I still don't know what I did wrong, I swear I did not touch him) . But he knows what I did wrong and he spoke up in protest. You know what he or she is doing wrong. Speak up,how else do you stand a chance of other people getting to know.

Did I tell you that I am friends with that my colleague? Yes, we are good friends. After all nobody cracks jokes with strangers unless you are a pervert. And of course, we do not have (too) many perverts among us. We are church- going holier than thou Saints who do no wrong, talk more of "sexual"  or "immoral" wrongs.

Just for the records,if  you know any of my actions has been judged as molestation by you,this is your Harvey Weinstein moment. Speak up now or forever remain silent. It is not tomorrow now when I become somebody, you people will come and form a " MetooMoment" gang on me.

Kwu kwa okwu now!!!